Posted by Anne

Living life without a schedule is tricky these days.  Even if you’re craving a more fluid calendar, there are some hefty roadblocks known as “outlook”, “blackberry”, and that bizarre entity called Twitter.  But recently, I enjoyed(?) a week that was completely free of all those pesky modern homing devices.  My schedule was put on hold, and nobody could complain.  Folks, this is the beauty of…jury duty.

I’ll admit I wasn’t excited to fulfill my civic duty.  I had meetings and to-do lists.  And I like my routine!  But when that judge called my name, I had to accept my fate.  I was at the mercy of 3 attorneys, a judge, and 17 alpacas.  Why the alpacas, you ask?  (You must be asking this.)  Well, because this trial–the one I lived and breathed for 4 days–told the story of several alpacas, and their two caretakers who just didn’t see eye to eye.

But before I get to those fabulous  creatures, a word or two on the week.  During the first day or two of the trial, I acted in typical Anne fashion.  I multi-tasked, and tried to squeeze the work I was missing into the hours before and after court.  I flew into the house at the end of the day, and glued myself to my e-mail until I felt “caught up”.  But on the 3rd morning of this frantic routine, something nice happened.  My husband intervened.  He thwarted my plans to cram in an early morning workout by simply saying, “Why don’t you walk the dogs with me?”  Surprisingly, I said, “okay.”  I slowed down.  We chatted.  And that walk with my husband set the tone for the rest of the previously dreaded jury duty.

Which brings me back to the alpacas (and llamas, truth be told.)  Do I know more about those critters than I ever needed to?  Yep.  Was jury duty a pain?  You bet.  But when I stopped trying to be in two places at once, I ended up being just the slightest bit entertained.  The highlights, for those inquiring minds out there:

1.  Keeping track of the suits worn by the female attorney.  She had some  seriously cool shoes, people.

2.   Watching with reverence as a leading expert on alpacas sauntered into the courtroom like he had just left a grand Peruvian alpaca ranch.  He was huge, dignified, and made alpaca breeding practices sound downright civilized. Ironically, he also had some seriously cool footwear.  Boots, obviously, that were probably worth more than the collective “jury salary” of all 13 jurors.

3.      Watching as the “wise old judge” (as I called him) would pop up from his laptop, look suspiciously at the attorneys, and say “Where is this going?”

4.      Gaining a new vocabulary.  Legal jargon is great.  My favorite?  Duplicative. As in, “This line of questioning regarding alpaca fiber content is sooooooo duplicative.”  Use it in a sentence.  It’s super fun.

5.      Stifling a giggle any time a suit-clad attorney would utter alpaca names that were usually something akin to “honey-bear” or “curly-cue”.

6.      Developing camaraderie with my fellow jurors—people outside my tiny world.  Farmers, hairdressers, martial arts instructors…you name it.  They rocked.  I’ll probably never see them again.

So there you have it.  When I settled down, and became a full-time jury member, I sorta liked my crazy alpaca trial.  Makes me wonder what other small, amusing moments I miss when I’m trying to be somewhere other than the present. I’m sure they’re numerous.  So a thank you to Uncle Sam and those dear alpacas, for making me ditch my schedule, and live for a few days on your terms.

So I'm actually not sure if this is a llama or alpaca. 10 points to anyone who can tell me!