Posted by Elizabeth

Dreamy, steamy, or creepy?

Confession:  I used to be a major American Idol fan. During the first six seasons, I never missed a single episode – and if you know the amount of hours that show occupies on the airwaves between January and May each year, you know that’s a major time commitment.  In fact, AI (that’s what real fans call it, you know: AI) was one of the first mutual passions/grotesque fascinations/guilty pleasures that Anne and I shared.  Our obsession reached a fever pitch in graduate school, AI providing a balm to our weary souls.  (Anne and I have a theory that the level of seriousness in your television programming has a direct, inverse correlation to the level of stress and anxiety in your daily work life.  Needless to say, graduate school was prime AI territory.)  I would call Anne during commercial breaks, and we’d recap what had just happened in the previous 15-minute segment, ogling Constantine Maroulis’ dreamy hair and hypnotic smile, while laughing hysterically at John Steven’s infamous falsetto version of Crocodile Rock.  When I moved away, our debriefs continued via letter, and we filled pages (yes, I admit, pages) predicting winners and losers and dissecting Kristy Lee Cook’s hoe-down version of Eight Days a Week.

But at some point along the way, we got a life lost interest.  Eventually, AI faded into the background, and I’d be hard-pressed to tell you much about anything that’s transpired the past three seasons.  When I returned from my ‘round-the-world trip last March, smack dab in the middle of season eight, everyone was talking about Adam Lambert, the rumored favorite.  Already feeling like a cultural pariah after eight months off the map, I decided to increase my pop culture IQ by tuning into a few episodes.  True to reports, Lambert was interesting and edgy (or at least as edgy as AI allows you to be), a strong singer and great performer to boot.  And, as is so often the case with the AI franchise, the best contestant doesn’t win, the winner fades into obscurity, and the runner-up shoots to meteoric fame.

Yesterday I was watching Oprah (what else is there to do when you’re playing The Waiting Game?), and the theme of the show was “Big Breaks,” featuring Susan Boyle and Adam Lambert.  To be honest, I wasn’t very interested in either guest, but, like I said, what else is there to do when you’re playing The Waiting Game?  But what followed was a surprisingly interesting interview with Mr. Lambert who, by my estimation, is an articulate young man with a solid head on his shoulders.  What interested me most about his story was how a musical theatre performer had managed to refashion himself as a glam rocker on American Idol without being accused of “selling out” or “not knowing himself” (for those uninitiated, AI judges LOVE to slap those labels on contestants)?

A few years ago, Lambert reported, he wanted to “make something happen” in his life.  He was bored, but unsure exactly how he wanted his life to be different – he didn’t have any specific goals he wanted to achieve or milestones to reach – but he was clear that he wanted it to change.  He began by simply asking The Universe to bring something new into his life.  For awhile he did nothing but think about the change.  In a process that he calls “positive projection,” he would imagine in his head how his life might be different.  “And then I took action,” he said, auditioning for American Idol on a whim, unsure if the show would respond to his “left-of-center” aesthetic and unusual background.  The rest, as they say, is history, but even Lambert concedes that how this dream manifested itself is far bigger than he ever believed it would be.

So what does all of this have to do with living life in pencil?  This is a very roundabout way to get at a very simple point:  big changes often have very humble beginnings.  Sometimes we feel we need something to be different in our life, but we’re unsure what that “something” is.  In our goal-oriented culture, where specific objectives hold more cache than vague urges, I think we often shy away from change unless we have something specific in mind that we want to be different.  When I worked as a career counselor, I sometimes caught myself falling into this pervasive mindset, telling my clients, for example, that it was fruitless to begin a job search until they knew what they were searching for.  But Adam Lambert’s story seems to suggest the contrary.  In his version of change, we need only be specific in our intention that we want things to be different somehow – defining what that change is isn’t part of the equation.  That’s the part we leave up to The Universe.  And isn’t there something liberating in that?  For many of us, we won’t make even the smallest nudge towards change until our goal is 100% clear.  But my fear is that we might get stuck waiting a lifetime.

The other key point of Lambert’s “model” is he met thinking with doing.  Just a few days ago I wrote about “doing something” versus “doing nothing” when you’re faced with an existential crisis – the kind of crisis Lambert faced just over a year ago.  Lambert’s life change came about through equal parts doing and being.  After he’d spent some time thinking about the changes, he knew that nothing would transpire without action on his part.  He didn’t know at the time if American Idol was the answer – it could easily not have been – but taking action kept him moving forward.  Most of us prefer being or doing, but that only brings us halfway there; clearly, Lambert shows us we need both.  But even a combination of being and doing won’t get us to our destination if our intention isn’t clear, pure, and true.  When pure intent meets a clear vision and strong action, The Universe provides in ways that are bigger than we ever could have imagined for ourselves.  All change, no matter how big or how small, begins with an intention, no matter how specific or vague.

Who says that American Idol is worthless – there’s obviously plenty of life lessons to be learned!  What have you learned about change, success, or risk-taking from American Idol, your favorite television programs, or other pop culture outlets?  Are you, or have you ever been, a huge American Idol fan? What do you think of Lambert’s “model” of change?  Don’t be hatin’ on pop culture, y’all!