Comments on: What If?

By: Shawna

Shawna — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 00:23:56 +0000

Motherhood as a never ending tide of worry which may ebb but when it flows it flows hard. Welcome!

By: Amber

Amber — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 05:31:43 +0000

I hope all goes well. After a routine ultrasound with my first, I was asked to come back because of stunted growth. When I went to the appointment, I was asked all sorts of questions regarding my background and if I had any history of Down’s Syndrome in my family. I didn’t. After a check, the OB said everything was fine.

Still, I worried up until the birth of my daughter. She was born healthy, luckily, but I remember the anxiety surrounding her birth.

By: Sarah

Sarah — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 04:10:15 +0000

Oh Elizabeth. The worry. The constant worry. It comes and goes like a tide. Foreground, background, foreground, background — as we drift through phases or reassuring our kids and reassuring ourselves. It’s exhausting, to be sure, but your refreshing outlook of CHANGE will serve you well. Very well.

I know that the fear comes on strong and it is hard to keep at bay at a time like this. I hope that everything turns out okay. The thought of a new little baby in your tummy makes me so desirous to share in those feelings of being a new mom. It is a blissful, heart-shaping experience. And what a wonderful, wonderful thing to have be able to write about it here on the blog. I only wish that Jen and I had had the foresight to start Momalom 5 years ago.

By: Maria

Maria — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 03:03:36 +0000

Elizabeth,

As scary as all this is, you must maintain a level of faith…because motherhood is a GIGANTIC leap of faith…I understand the worry, the what if’s floating in and out of your thoughts. For a short period of time, I thought my youngest had a brain tumor. The hours leading up to the specialist appointment were paralyzing, yet you put one foot in front of the other, take a deep breath and surrender. I hope all went well. Sending you lots of light and good wishes! Please keep us updated!

By: Nikki

Nikki — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:24:26 +0000

Sending good thoughts.

By: Jana

Jana — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:05:26 +0000

Motherhood is uncertain, and I don’t think I fully realized that until my son was born. He didn’t come as expected, and I told the nurse that he had already taught me to be flexible and adaptable, that I couldn’t control and plan everything. I’m sure you’ll be fine. Realize that while pregnant, you can be a lot more anxious than you would otherwise. Try to enjoy your last months as a couple before your world and sleep habits are turned upside down!

By: terry

terry — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 18:41:46 +0000

You’re living in my world now. I don’t know how I have managed to cope with all the lurking ‘what ifs.’ I wake up every night with a ‘what if’ scenario.

When those fears slip into your wonderful daydreams, chase them away. Worrying about things that haven’t happened won’t make them not happen and they won’t prepare anyway.

Enjoy this time Elizabeth. Everything is going to be great. Trust the blessed hormones that pregnancy provides and relax.

By: TheKitchenWitch

TheKitchenWitch — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 17:48:53 +0000

You’ll be in my thoughts today.

You are so right about motherhood. I remember telling my mom, not long after Miss D. was born, how TERRIFIED I felt. Because before her, I thought I was strong enough to bear any loss. Sure, if my husband or my parents died, I’d be devastated…but I always felt like I would, eventually, be able to move forward and cope.

But then I had Miss D., and suddenly I didn’t feel that certainty, that faith in my own strength. I don’t think I *could* survive the loss of her.

I think I put it rather inelegantly, saying something to the effect of, “Now I’m totally fucked.”

The idea that something could be wrong with our baby is a horrible thing. I worried constantly. I’m hoping everything is perfect.

And congrats on your victory! It was wonderful!

By: Cecilia

Cecilia — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 16:43:27 +0000

This is my grandchild, everything will be fine. Not to worry.

By: Kristen @ Motherese

Kristen @ Motherese — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 16:08:25 +0000

I am so impressed by your ability to capture one of the most important understandings of parenthood before you have even given birth: “motherhood is uncertainty incarnate.” Absolutely.

I had two high risk pregnancies, both of which set the stage for the ways in which I would lose control over aspects of my life once my sons were born.

I hope that everything turns out well at your appointment. I will be thinking of you.