Cluttered
Okay, it's not this bad...
This week, we’ve been discussing to-do lists. Life to-do lists. Cosmic to-do lists. But one astute reader reminded me that sometimes those little items on our lists can be just as satisfying to cross off—once the bigger items have been achieved. And as Elizabeth captured yesterday, having some concrete, achievable goals can motivate us—keep us moving forward.
This leaves me wondering…are there current goals? Goals I can achieve in the more immediate sense, that will also bring me peace? That will help me feel settled? (Always that need for “settled”…it deserves its own post, I tell you.) If I were to follow the guidance of The Happiness Project, (which accompanies me on my commute to work these days), I would start with something like…clearing my clutter. This is easy, right? And very satisfying. Maybe I should set this goal today! And cross it off next week! But I have a secret…
I kinda like clutter.
Not everyone knows this about me. I tend to hide this dirty little secret, shoving piles into drawers and preventing anyone from seeing the twisted mess of unfolded sweaters in my closet. And it may come as a surprise to some of you readers, as I’ve frequently declared myself a lover of all things list-like. But I have news for you. “Planners” are not always tidy. I can prove it. Currently, on or around my desk, are the following items:
1. A bright green post-it bearing a hastily written chocolate chip cookie recipe that has proven to be the Holy Grail in my ongoing quest for the perfect chocolate chip cookie recipe. (Because I’m nice, I will share.)
2. A phone number. No clue whose or what. Maybe I should call it and find out. But I won’t.
3. A souvenir golf ball from a course I played 7 MONTHS ago. It sits inside a cute little box that holds notecards, which means I have to remove it every time I want to snag a notecard.
Now, before you are totally grossed out and stop reading this post, I should clarify. I am clean. And relatively orderly. For example, my kitchen rarely goes without cleaning, and is actually very organized. But the stuff in my kitchen? It’s everywhere. Pitchers, utensils, and bottles of olive oil. My immaculately clean kitchen is still…cluttered.
A card I once bought. Ironically, I just found it the other day...amidst the clutter.
For some of you, just reading this declaration of clutter would be enough to drive you bonkers. But I have to admit…none of it really bothers me. I like my clutter. To me, there is warmth in my clutter. My piles—albeit relatively organized piles—create a sense of lived-in comfort. There’s just something about seeing my stuff—being surrounded by books, pictures, notes, or balsamic vinegar—that makes me feel simply…at home.
But there is another reason I remained relatively cluttered. It’s just not a priority. Frequently, when I come home in the evening, I buzz around—rarely sitting—fixing my lunch for the next day, cooking dinner, and prepping my coffee for the next morning. I can’t even count the number of times my husband has called me in from the kitchen to pat the blank space next to him on the couch and say, “Why don’t you just sit for a minute?” He’s asking me to be present. To stop bothering with the little things.
Would I feel more present–more “in the moment”–if I led a clutter-less life? Should I add it to my -to-do list right now? I have a very dear friend whom I visited a couple weeks ago in Seattle, and I’m always astounded by her lack of clutter. And not only that, but I find her home soothing, relaxing, and not frenetic. Her space is homey, but free of all the junk. But still…I can’t shake the feeling that if I truly decluttered, I’d miss the reminders, and the elements of my personality that are scattered and strewn all over our home.
So here’s my conclusion on these self-improvement lists—and “projects” that we seek to check off: There are no easy solutions, and what works for one person (Gretchen Rubin) may not work for me. My list must be my own. My life to-do-list does need items more easily checked off than “have a family” and “buy a house”. But these items will be my own priorities. I will hold onto a reasonable degree of clutter, and live in my swirl of stuff—my cluttered, but stimulating stuff.
Am I alone on this one? Does anyone else like a lot of stuff around their house? Or does clutter make you antsy? What are some check-off-able things we can do to be more peaceful, and more present?
February 25th, 2010 at 6:47 am
Well, to feel more peaceful, you can do what a crazy relative of mine does: she writes to-do lists incorporating things she has already done, just so she can cross them off. Like “Get up.” “Get dressed.” I’m not kidding.
As for clutter, and as for all things: moderation is the key. I agree that too little clutter is sterile. Too much and you’ll start showing up on Hoarders. You need the “just right” amount.
February 25th, 2010 at 7:10 am
Just to share a little from one of Anne’s pre-school teachers: In reference to how a kid “keeps” her bedroom–cluttered or tidy–one of Anne’s pre-school teachers called it “Sitting on apple cores.” Anne’s clutter is part of her charm.
February 25th, 2010 at 7:13 am
I’ve never heard that expression!! And I’m not sure it’s a compliment? But yes…my clutter is uber-charming. If you like clutter.
February 25th, 2010 at 8:54 am
At the age of 48, four years ago, I removed all my clutter. I remodeled a home into a modern dwelling that allows for no clutter. It’s great except I can’t figure out what to do with all my clutter?
February 25th, 2010 at 9:00 am
I could never go pure “minimalist.” I too need a certain level of “stuff” around me to feel homey and settled. But I need those things to be tidy and organized. I like shelves filled with books, but for the books to be categorized in some way. I like recipes that have been handed down, but for them to be filed correctly. When the stuff becomes clutter I start to infer it as a manifestation of the rest of my life and a sign that it’s time to tidy up – both literally and metaphorically.
February 25th, 2010 at 1:15 pm
Anne, I can totally relate AND I’m so glad you put it out there. I tend to feverishly clean up around the house/office/car right before people come around because I’m seen as a relatively list-oriented/organized girl (which often equates to clutterless). This post validates that I can be both!!
February 25th, 2010 at 6:08 pm
Don’t feel bad! Within my clutter, I know where the majority of the stuff I need is…and really, I hate to have to go through all of it to clean up…It will get to a point, from time to time, where I must PURGE!!! And I do! I think that time is better spent living that keeping stuff clutter free!
February 25th, 2010 at 6:55 pm
Oh man, if that stuff is clutter then what the heck is all the crap in my house called? Ayayayayiayaiyaiyaiyai!
I agree with clutter. I like it. I like organized clutter. Not junk. Not old mail I haven’t thrown away and let stack up for weeks on end. But little bit and pieces of reminders that I very much LIVE in this house. Notes, phone numbers taped to my monitor, books under, over and on everything. Kids artwork tucked in drawers. Screwdrivers parked on every ledge.
Oh man. I could do some serious examining of all of this…I suppose. But it’s me. And, like you, it makes me comfortable. When there gets to be too much of it, I clean it up and start anew…but all while leaving a arrangement of stuff around as the bare minimum.
February 26th, 2010 at 12:43 pm
This is such an interesting post. And for me, very timely. My home and heart and mind are very cluttered and I am just now realizing that this is in part out of choice. Intellectually, I love the idea of tidiness and clean lines. But in reality, I thrive in chaos, find metaphor in mayhem. How to reconcile my desire for order and the reality that chaos is what drives me?